O-! Naruto Nippon! - Episode 15 12th January, 2004 ------- Starring: Uzumaki Naruto - Takeuchi Junko Orochimaru - Kujira Mentioned: Hatake Kakashi - Inoue Kazuhiko Maito Gai - Ebara Masashi ------- NARUTO We're on air from the studio of the Hidden Leaf, from the other side of the Herz! We're going to have a crunching good time today too! Kyu kyu! Aniplex Hour! Uzumaki Naruto's Oo! Naruto Nippon! Good evening! I'm Takeuchi Junko, the voice of Uzumaki Naruto, the personality of this show! And the ManPa who's doing this program with me is this person! OROCHIMARU When someone calls, you answer, "JA JA JA"... Good evening!!!!! I'm the voice of Orochimaru - KU! JI! RA! WHEE!!!! NARUTO NO!!! THIS IS NOT OROCHIMARU ANYMORE!! OROCHIMARU I'm so full of life today too!! Kyu kyu! NARUTO KYU KYU!! Kujira-san's ManPa is still going on so everybody, look forward to it! OROCHIMARU Look forward to it! NARUTO Today I'm going to ask Kujira-san something I've been wanting to ask from since a long time ago. OROCHIMARU What is it? Please ask ahead. NARUTO Is 'Kujira-san' your real name? OROCHIMARU How can it be?! Do you think I was born in the Antartica?! (kujira means whale) NARUTO I really want to know what was the origin of this stage name? OROCHIMARU It was during this one program show. I was the reporter, you see, so the producer... yeah, anyway my real name is Matsumoto Wakako. Cute, eh? Matsumoto Wakako. But the producer said it was not interesting. Rethink it, please, he said. I was like, even if you tell me it's not interesting... So while I was thinking, Chiba Shigeru came and said, 'Waka-chan, I have a good name for you.' So I said, 'What is it? Chiba-san?' He said, 'Kujira.' 'Kujira?? You mean Kujira as in, whale?' 'And it has to be in Hiragana! It is good for gender differentiation. It's all good.' '... Chiba-san. You mean, gender differentiation by the name, right? So this Kujira thing... nobody can tell at all!!' 'No no no, it's KU!! Jira! It's all good.' I didn't really get it but anyway I took it. So now I exist as such. NARUTO I see! OROCHIMARU Chiba-san is well known for his hobby of giving people stupid names. But people usually don't like it. He really gives strange names, like Burp and stuff, stupid names like that. People don't want it so they don't take it usually. He also called me the Office Engine for some reason. I took the name so he was very happy. So I was no longer the Office Engine. NARUTO Really? But Kujira-san is a good name. Really. OROCHIMARU It's easy to remember. And it's in Hiragana. NARUTO Very easy to remember! Good. It's gigantic! No matter what you say it's gigantic! OROCHIMARU It's gigantic, eh? NARUTO It's the biggest mammal in the world! OROCHIMARU That's right! Well you have Kujira in your heart. NARUTO What, are you trying to squash the Iruka there? (iruka = dolphin) Now that I come to think of it. OROCHIMARU I'm looking for a fight. NARUTO And that's the Kujira-san who has her own ideas! So anyway, yeah, let's begin our explanation. In this program, if your mail gets read out your rank will increase accordingly. In other words, it's a selection test based on your strength datte ba yo! Currently, all of you listening to the radio are candidates for graduation in the Academy. According to how often your mail is read out, you'll raise to the Genin, Chuunin and Jounin ranks! If you become Jounin you'll be invited to the studio! OROCHIMARU That's great! NARUTO Well, that'll only happen after your mail is read out 30 times. OROCHIMARU That's far. That's very far away. Still so long to go. NARUTO Still so long to go indeed. So now we'll introduce some mails without delay! Let's go. Ore no Nindou! Watashi no Nindou! So I'll read this one first. Academy Student from Tokushima. Marin-san's Nindou! "I will pat the wounds I get from falling down! This is Watashi no Nindou Datte ba yo!" I understand this. I touch them all. Touchy touch touch. OROCHIMARU Ah yes. I do too. Like, 'Oh, it's coming out!' NARUTO Ain't that right! So Kujira-san, please. OROCHIMARU Then here I go. Academy Student from Touyama. Nigi-san's Nindou! "Cheese in Onigiri for me! This is Atashi no Nindou Datte ba yo!" NARUTO No way. OROCHIMARU I wonder. It might be delicious if it was barbequed Onigiri though. NARUTO Oh wow, maybe we should try it next time! Then one from me. Academy Student from Tokyo. Shikamaru Daisuki-san's Nindou! "I only buy western dresses during bargain sales datte ba yo!" I see. There may be good stuff during bargain sales, she means. There are, of course. OROCHIMARU There are. Like a netsuke, for instance. (netsuke = miniature carving attached to the end of a cord hanging from a pouch) During the bargain sales. NARUTO But I always lose to the others when I try to jostle with them during sales. OROCHIMARU That's true. You have to be really sly to get into the crowd. NARUTO You have to go zun zun. OROCHIMARU And gan gan. Anyway! One mail I'll read here! Academy Student from Chiba, Sausu-san's Nindou! "I'll donate blood once in a while for sure! This is Watashi no Nindou Datte ba yo!" She's in middle-fast gear about this. NARUTO Wow! But I like to donate blood too. OROCHIMARU I did it before. NARUTO Really? I really like the feeling that I'm getting all my bad blood out of the system. OROCHIMARU They stopped me from donating once. On my hangover morning. NARUTO No! That won't do! OROCHIMARU They say you can't do that, eh? NARUTO So anyway, if you must donate blood, do it with a big heart and a healthy body. And with that, let's go WILD all the way to the end today as well! Give your night to me tte ba yo! OROCHIMARU I really must have you... I must have you, the listener! *hiss* [song] NARUTO And now, listen to this one song! Kanashimi o Yasashisa ni by Little by Little. [song] Aniplex Hour This program was brought to you by Aniplex, Sony Music Entertainment and Showa-Note. Aniplex Hour! Uzumaki Naruto's Oo! Naruto Nippon! COMMERCIAL We're gaining popularity! The DVD series is going to be powered up even more from next year on! Our story's burning hot with one new season! And we've got some yet to be seen footages all inside too! NARUTO Second Stage - Scroll One! On sale from January 1st by Aniplex! 2004 is the Year of Naruto! NARUTO Narikiri, Henge no Jutsu!! (Complete Change! It's the Art of Transformation!) And now, the monthly personality Kujira-san and I will throw off all our restraints and compete against each other with a Henge no Jutsu. We'll transform into what's written on the cards we draw out from the pile, and see who does the better complete change. In other words, this is a Forbidden Jutsu. In addition! On the part of the person who loses, for one unit of training, we'll have the loser do the Konoha Gakure Hiden, Taijutsu Ougi, Sennen Goroshi - not! (The Secret Taijutsu Ultimate Technique of Hidden Leaf, Thousand Years of Pain) We'll have the loser do the Oiroke no Jutsu. And with that, Kujira-san. In other words. It's pretty easy for you to do, eh? OROCHIMARU That's true. I'm gonna do this. NARUTO Really? OROCHIMARU I'm going to win. I'm confident of winning. NARUTO You're confident. I wonder if you can win. Nfufufufufufu. OROCHIMARU Oh, this one here is overconfident. NARUTO Then Kujira-san, let's both draw cards out. Kujira-san will start. What's written on it? OROCHIMARU Oda Nobunaga. (a supposed tyrant in warring period of 1500s. his actions brought about much controversy and debate. he died in the blaze that burned down the temple he was in during 1582.) NARUTO You got the tough one! OROCHIMARU Oda Nobunaga eh... NARUTO So Kujira-san, please go ahead with the Henge no Jutsu. OROCHIMARU Henge! Fifty years of life... Ho ho... ho... hot! HOT! Going up in flames! NARUTO So well, yeah. We could really feel Oda Nobunaga's final repentance. His repentance over his entire life. OROCHIMARU He's going up in flames. NARUTO Going up in flames! OROCHIMARU Going up in flames! NARUTO Going up in flames!! OROCHIMARU Going up in flames! Yes, that's the part. NARUTO Sheesh, what a person I'm having here. I... me... I got... Something from Academy Student Niyamo-san. Sheep getting hair shaved. Why did I get something like this too?! Do sheep go 'baa'? Baaa. Then here I go. Henge! Please move a bit lower. Ah, that tickles. Please, not there. Do you intend to go there? No, not that. Ah, that spot please. Please leave some there. Make me a cute cut please. Bye bye. OROCHIMARU I wonder. That was a really highly prolific sheep. NARUTO So with this. Sorry, all listeners. This is just a bad day for us. OROCHIMARU It was really great. I couldn't tell if it was sheep or not anymore. That's good. Move a bit lower, it said. NARUTO What did the sheep mean, lower?? Where's the lower hair?? OROCHIMARU A sheep has furballs maybe? NARUTO I wonder who had the more complete change. Let's decide by the majority. Who thought Kujira-san did better, raise your hand! Okay. So few. Who thought I did better, raise your hand? Oh, nobody at all. So yes. I win. OROCHIMARU How come?! NARUTO I think it's about time we entered the Real Thing. We're supposed to let the ManPa do this! So the one who will be doing the Oiroke no Jutsu will be Kujira-san. OROCHIMARU Awww, can I pull this off?? NARUTO Yes, you have to do this. The basics are Bon Kyu Bon! OROCHIMARU Bon Kyu Bon! NARUTO NOT Bon Bon Bon. OROCHIMARU Bon yes Bon yes, I understand. NARUTO Now, please do the Oiroke no Jutsu. OROCHIMARU Oiroke no Jutsu! Bon~~ Kyu~~ Bon~~ Oh, look at the valley in between my breasts~~ Uhmhm~~ Ahaha~~ Hahaha~~ *hiss* *hiss* NARUTO You know. OROCHIMARU What. NARUTO All up till now, Ishida-san, Kazuhiko-san, Morikubo-kun... they all did the Oiroke no Jutsu. This is the first time we're hearing a girl do it. It was the most, how should I put it. It was the most erotic! I'm glad I got to hear it. OROCHIMARU Really. Listeners, everybody, I think all of you have retreated by now? NARUTO No we have not! OROCHIMARU I think all of you are like, 50 metres away from the radio now. I'm really sorry. NARUTO And that was, a really great Narikiri Henge no Jutsu section! Aniplex Hour! Uzumaki Naruto's Oo! Naruto Nippon! COMMERCIAL The new comic series of Gravitation has evolved into a drama cd! There are now new characters, and the drama is powered up! It's also got the new single Fake Star by me, Shindou Shuuichi! A super high-tension dangerous love comedy! Gravitation Drama CD Volume 1! On sales from Aniplex from January 28th! The famous works of Osawa Satoru has been given life again after forty years. A great, epic adventure. Original Video Animation. 3/7O7 Demolition. Now selling. Onwards to the sea of dreams and adventure... Aniplex Hour! Uzumaki Naruto's Oo! Naruto Nippon! NARUTO Oh! Naruto Nippon! We have the voice of Orochimaru in the studio - Kujira-san with us! We're going to let loose and question Kujira-san right here and now! OROCHIMARU Let loose and question. Yes. NARUTO So yeah. What kind of a character is Orochimaru?... is what's written here. Well, I think everybody more or less should know. What I really want to ask is this. Kujira-san, do you often do roles like Orochimaru? OROCHIMARU This is my first time in a role like this. NARUTO I thought so. I don't know everything but, you often do bright and happy characters, don't you? OROCHIMARU Yes, bright characters or some monsters I don't really understand either? Or strange people. People like that. I did transvestites before too. This character... is the first of its kind for me. NARUTO This guy is really... well, he gives off a repulsive purple aura. He's scary. He's so hard to do. OROCHIMARU Well, this is... you see, he's not human! NARUTO You said it! He's human but not human. OROCHIMARU He's so un-human, isn't he? NARUTO There's no human in this world who can stretch his tongue out for so long! OROCHIMARU Of course not! Only in manga do things like that happen. NARUTO Is there anything you take note of when you do his voice then? OROCHIMARU Well... As much as possible I try not to put too much colour into his character. I try not to voice him as a human. But I'm human after all so it can't be helped. Sometimes I don't realise it but my voice just keeps getting chirpy. So they'd tell me, 'Kujira-san, your voice is a bit happy today.' 'Is that so? I need to be dark? A bit bright?' I really don't get it. So difficult. NARUTO You can really hear Kujira-san's real voice coming out. /I/ on the other hand have to be bright and happy! OROCHIMARU If I become just slightly careless the voice just slips. NARUTO I see. OROCHIMARU You really have to watch yourself very carefully for this role. It gets so nervous. NARUTO Really. Nervous, you say? So pitiful! Where Kujira-san always sits, beside you would be Kazuhiko-san, that's Kakashi-sensei. And the other side is Gai-sensei. With these two distinguished gentlemen, you get double oyaji-gags coming at you from both sides! OROCHIMARU From both sides! So you see, when everybody else keeps quiet at the jokes they make, I have to take it all in. Yes yes, yes that was great! To make them happy. If I don't accept the jokes they'd look at me with such pitiful faces. So difficult for me. NARUTO When Kujira-san wasn't in the studio yet I had to return their jokes little bit by little bit. I really don't understand them. We said stupid things like Bon Kyu Bon but. I really can't say it out to them! I really can't! So Kujira-san has to cut them all up cleanly - thank you so much! There are times when Kujira-san really /becomes/ Orochimaru. And when that happens at the studio... It feels like the temperature just... lowers. Like, what the- who the heck is this person- OROCHIMARU It's like the characters themselves are dunking it out in the studio. So we have to accept them. NARUTO We have to. Right. OROCHIMARU It really can't be helped. NARUTO So between a Boke and a Tsukkomi, Kujira-san, you're a Tsukkomi type? (in japanese stage comedy setups, there will be a boke - the receiver and the tsukkomi - the attacker. the boke is usually at the receiving end of jokes, and the tsukkomi makes the jokes to attack the boke.) OROCHIMARU Yes! I'm a Tsukkomi no matter how you look at me! I 'attack' while I was on the 'receiving' end though. So anyway, yeah, I'm Tsukkomi no matter how you look at it. NARUTO I'm quite Tsukkomi too. OROCHIMARU I understand. That's good. NARUTO I really, want to Tsukkomi Kazuhiko-san's words sometimes. But It'll become something really rude so I can't say it. OROCHIMARU That's delicate. Very delicate. NARUTO It's so hard to find the right words to say. OROCHIMARU If you get older you can pull it off. NARUTO Really? OROCHIMARU Once you get older. It'll be okay. About five more years for you. NARUTO Really? OROCHIMARU Yes, it'll be all right. NARUTO I'll learn by looking at you. OROCHIMARU Learn from me... NARUTO You've been okay so far. You've been okay so far, that's why. OROCHIMARU It's really, you know, I just barely get through. I just barely manage to Tsukkomi. NARUTO We're always in a precarious situation! OROCHIMARU Yes, very precarious. I put my life on stake. It's like a battleground out there. NARUTO So funny! OROCHIMARU I really don't get it. NARUTO And with that, we never got to talk about Orochimaru at all. Is a program like this okay? But you'll still be our ManPa, so, we'll be asking more and more things about Kujira-san! OROCHIMARU Please send in your mails. I'll send too. NARUTO Send us what you want to ask. We're collecting feedback from you all for the program! Send your questions to the cast, and of course, Henge no Jutsu suggestions, your Nindou, Music Care, etc etc! If your mail gets read out you'll get /something/ good. Please read us the missive address. OROCHIMARU Postcards should go to: PO 552-8501 Radio Oosaka O-! Naruto Nippon Email should be in small letters: naruto@obc1314.com That's naruto@obc1314.com NARUTO Gather your chakra to your fingers and send your mails and postcards to the program! Send them all in and you can become a hero datte ba yo! And with that, O-! NARUTO Nippon draws to a close! We'll be broadcasting next week with all our chakra as well! Kujira-san, I'm counting on you next week too! OROCHIMARU Leave it to me. Everybody, please continue to listen to me! Pleased to be of service! Next week too! NARUTO And so, see you same time next week! You've been listening to Takeuchi Junko and! OROCHIMARU Kujira! NARUTO Bye bye! OROCHIMARU Bai bai~~ Kyu kyu bon! Kyu kyu bon! NARUTO Stay tuned for Aniplex Hour - Hagaren Housoukyoku after the commercials datte ba yo! OROCHIMARU Kyukyubon! Bonkyubon! Bonkyubon kyukyubon! BON KYU BON! NARUTO SHUT UP!! ------- 7.August.2004 Brought to you by: [XD Fanworks] http://www.tougenkyou.net/xd/ [something white and puffy] http://www.livejournal.com/~kuuumo/ Raw provider: kuuumo Translation: Pan Special thanks: Yorugu-shishou Archives: http://www.tougenkyou.net/xd/ http://virtual-rotation.com/naruto/ IRC (look for TouBot): Efnet (irc.efnet.net) - #tougenkyou IRCHighway (irc.irchighway.net) - #pushy-uke Please feel free to distribute this script, with all the credits intact! :-)